“To me, beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. It’s about knowing and accepting who you are.”
So I am onto my fourth week, still don’t really know how to describe these post, where as I have been obsessed in the past with fitness and basically self hating this is not that and I hope never to be in that place again. I have finally started a new chapter of self love and wanted to document it and as if having a normal and fashion Instagram wasn’t enough I decided to set a third one up! emmas_happy_healthy_world is a celebration of me loving my body! I have literally spent the last 34 years picking myself apart, self hating and punishing my body instead of celebrating and loving it! In the last six months I have gained weight, my body shape has completely changed and my mental health around my body has made an unrecognisable change.
Anyone else look in the mirror in the morning and feel amazing! Like your hair sits perfectly! Make up looks good and you think you have an amazing outfit on! Then you take a photograph and you wonder how you left the house looking like crap?
Monday was that day! But instead of focusing about why I thought I looked good in the mirror I decided to focus on why my camera was obviously shit! The negative thoughts we tell ourselves stick around much longer then the positive! So let’s make a point to tell ourselves lots of positive thoughts every single day so there is no room for negative ones!!
Hair looked cute!
Walked to work and got some fresh air!
I wore one of my favourite skirts!
I ate a family bar of chocolate and enjoyed every bite!
Used a new shade of lipstick that I love!
Hit my step goal!
Enjoyed 7 hours of sleep
Just recently my social media has been spiting out memories like there’s no tomorrow! Mainly memories from three years ago! Which then leads to a whole host of comments such as! ‘wow, you looked amazing” “do you miss being skinny?” “Are you ever going to go back to looking like that?” So let’s look at the stats!
Weight 13st 7lbs
Mental state, happy
Period had stopped from being so small
Countless visits to plastic surgeons to get smaller
Up to 6 hours a day in the gym
Only eating calories I could burn off that day
Tears in the mirror every single day
Covered in bruises
A boyfriend who rewarded every lb lost
9% Body fat
Sad if I didn’t lose weight
Making sure I could count each rib before I went to sleep at night.
Getting constantly offended when actual loved ones told me I looked ill.
Happiness is not a number, it’s not a size! Being skinny doesn’t equal happiness! No size or number makes you happy. What makes you happy is how you feel within. It’s knowing your worth. It’s taking pleasure in things you love.
Don’t assume because someone is smaller than you they are happy! They might be or they might envy your curves. Don’t judge a person on the way they look or aspire to have their body. Take all that energy and aspire to be happy!
My mental state now
My thighs dance to the bass in my car
I bloody love a Danish for breakfast
I enjoy exercise for fun.
I don’t hide my cellulite
I wear what I want.
Sometimes when I wave my bingo wings wave in the opposite direction.
“Breathing is the first act of life and the last. Our very life depends on it.” – Joseph Pilate’s
Wednesday I went to a Pilates class, now that I am older I am more interested in exercise that will look after my whole being rather then exercising to lose lbs! I struggle like you wouldn’t believe with my breathing techniques! It’s why I have struggled to get back into running! Half way through workouts I realise I am holding my breath in, instead of inhaling and exhaling! Pilates and yoga really help me get into a breathing routine!
Plus I am hoping it will help with my bad leg! Everything can be sorted with a good stretch!
Thursday I went to Aqua Hiit & did a swim! As I was wiggling into my swimsuit I noticed my thighs (not that they are hard to miss these days). I then overheard other women complaining about their own thighs and worrying about wearing summer clothes this year!
Let’s break thighs down!
So my thighs-
Have stretch marks
Dance to the bass in my car!
Squat 80kgs happily
Hike 20 miles on a Sunday
Have climbed mountains
Walked me away from toxic relationships
Dance until 6am with friends!
Run around after my niece!.
A good place to rest my pizza on!
Why do we only compare our worth to the top list? Next time someone tries to make you feel bad about your legs, use them to dance the hell away from their negative vibes!
“It is a shame for a man to grow old without seeing the beauty and strength of which his body is capable.” Socrates
Two Pilates classes in a week! Who even am I anymore plus walking to and from work and an aqua fit class!! I may be smiling in this picture but I forgot to bloody breathe and I ate too much before class so utterly pretty sick!! Although for the first time ever I am really enjoying Pilates fingers crossed I keep it up!
Sunday was all about balance, I walked ten miles, had a salad for lunch and then ate two ice creams! At this point in my life, my body is all about balance! I don’t want to be focusing on one area. I don’t want to give up meals with friends to be in the gym. At the same time I don’t want to be out eating or drinking every night without exercise! I am not perfect at balance yet but I am certainly on the right track!