Being in your thirties!

Being in your thirties!

“The only time you really live fully is from thirty to sixty. The young are slaves to dreams; the old servants of regret. Only the middle aged have all their five senses in the keeping of their wits.”

Hervey Allan

I remember a time long, long ago when I thought turning 30 would be the worst thing imaginable. When I felt that being 30 was old and boring, and by 30 I would be living with one front in the grave. Your early 20’s are definitely for being cocky, overconfident and trying anything and everything. They are for partying like it’s 1999 (God i’m old), for making foolish mistakes and experimenting. You spend the age of 29 in a weird place worried over the thought of turning the big 3 0. It is as if the second you enter your thirties you think you must have your whole life together. Well the truth is you don’t, not even a little bit, you can carry on living your life exactly how you have been doing. A few things do change but I can honestly tell you that being in your thirties is the most incredible time of your life, I am already excited for my forties.  

Your body confidence is different!

In your twenties you have a different kind of body confidence, you are happy to wear little dresses and bikinis all year round if possible. Chances are you have a flat tummy still, you are stretch mark free and you are still able to every anything and everything you want without a single worry. Once you are in your 30s the way you feel about your body completely changes, you feel sexier with more clothes on not to mention your entire wardrobe changes. Despite the fact that I am actually in better shape now than in my twenties I have wobbly thighs, stretch marks and a little more cellulite than I would like. Now that I am the grand old age of 33 not only do I embrace these parts of me I actually love them, I have had 33 amazing years of life, I have lived with passion and zero regrets, this life is now forever with me in the form of at least a dozen scars across my body. But instead of trying to hide these parts of my body, I instead love them and from time to time flaunt them.

Your taste in men is better

Your twenties are for having lots and lots of fun with all the wrong guys, usually they have lots of tattoos, a motorbike and treat you like shit but they are fun. But once you get into your thirties you start looking for something/someone a little different. Honestly sometimes I facebook stalk some of my exes from my twenties and wonder what the fuck I was thinking. I’m not saying I don’t make mistakes with men in my thirties because believe me I do but now the mistakes wear a suit and smell good. It is safe to say that I am now looking for my forever guy and if nothing else I have lots of practise of what I do not want.

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You are at your sexaul peak

…………..Maybe because the men are slightly better, certainly less selfish or because of the new body confidence.

Whatever the reason my sex drive has been through the roof since hitting my thirties. Not to mention that once you hit your thirties you suddenly know exactly what you want in the bedroom and you aren’t shy about asking for it. There is absolutely no embarrassment around sex in your thirties and you want to try everything you were too shy to ask for in your twenties. You also have much more of a disposable income to treat yourself to extra nice underwear and toys so even during those dry months you can still feel special.

You do not waste time with people you don’t like

Your twenties is a pot of mixed emotions you may not stand for someone being shitty to you but you tend to tolerate a lot more because a friend likes them or because you don’t want to cause a massive falling out between a group of friends. Or you might put up with the office bitch because you don’t want to make the whole office feel uneasy or your work life harder than it needs to be. By the end of your twenties you no longer give a flying fuck, naturally you don’t want to be a bitch, you are not hurtful or nasty to anyone. You just now don’t care about the conflict that may be caused from you simply standing up for yourself. This also goes for boyfriends and family members too, you discover your own happiness is worth more.

You have more direction and self confidence

I was luckily enough to spend a lot of time during my twenties traveling the world which is now something I feel truly blessed for. Despite the fact that again I was extremely lucky enough to go to university during my twenties I had absolutely no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up. It is only now at 33 that I have discovered what I love and have been lucky enough to get a job in the field. Which I got from part luck and extreme self confidence in myself, which seemed to work because I got the job during the interview with no experience or any of the right qualifications. Now I am in my thirties I know exactly who I am and have absolutely no shame about it.

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You put yourself first

During your twenties if the phone rings in the evening it tends to be an invitation for a night out, usually you would be half dressed before you even finished the conversation. In your thirties if you hear your phone ring on a Friday or Saturday night you pretend you didn’t hear it. Not because suddenly you have become boring but because that time can be used for some self care. All your decisions about your life and how you chose to live it come from a very different place. I have a voice and I use it, usually far too much. I now know just how important self care is and how looking after yourself is important to enable you to be a better friend, daughter, sister or girlfriend.

You grew up in the nineties

I realise that a lot of you reading this are in your twenties and you do not realise just how amazing it was to be a teenager in the nineties. For starters I got to experience the Spice Girls and the start of Girl Power, I had the biggest crush on all the members of The Backstreet Boys. There were some low points like the trouser/skirt combo that was very popular for a time or Peter Andre. The nineties really was the last best decade, the music, fashion, TV, movies and icons. It was the decade when Bill Clinton “did not have sexual relations with that woman” turns out he did! The fresh prince of Bel-Air was always on the telly.  We didn’t mess around with having the latest phones we just cared about keeping our cyber pets alive. This is making me want to write a whole blog post on the nineties.

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