I wish I had some hilariously tragic story or some classic bad horror anecdote to tell you all, but the truth is I have a lovely story with a god awful ending of heartbreak.
After one too many bottles of wine with the girls on a night out they convinced me to download Tinder, without the wine the idea would have horrified me but the drink made me think that dick pics would be funny at 2 AM and with that simple action I met a really nice guy, like a really nice guy! We have had 10 weeks of incredible dates including a missed flight to Paris, 36 hours drinking in Manchester, kissing in a cave and a fractured skull.
For the first time ever I was unapologetically myself I was honest, open and allowed myself to fully enjoy the experience. We looked up at the stars together, kissed all night long, lay in the grass and watch the world go by. I am talking some serious chick flick moments, think of your three favourite romantic comedies merge them together and that’s how my life has been for the last 10 weeks. Truly utterly amazing, I couldn’t have asked for a better Tinder match.
And as scary as this is, and I’m pretty sure it goes against every dating rule in every country since the start of time I started to fall in love with this really nice guy although I definitely wasn’t ready to tell him this yet as I was enjoying every moment with him. I never expected to get any feelings for someone I met on tinder or online for that matter. Unfortunately it just wasn’t meant to be, I never need someone to love me the same way as I do, I am not sorry about the way I love or worry that I love too quickly, or with too much passion! This is who I am! I’m not ashamed of this fact nor do I feel the need to change this part of who I am.
However it came to the point where I needed to step away from him to allow him to think about what he really wants, to protect my own happiness because I seriously don’t want to be in love with someone who doesn’t want the same things as I do, that shit will fuck you up! As I’m writing this he is apparently thinking about what he wants, honestly I don’t ever expect to hear from him again and that’s okay because this is the whole point of dating to see what you want, this doesn’t make him a bad guy in fact it makes him even nicer. I would always have pain and honesty over pleasure and lies. If I do ever hear from him again this will be one of the greatest fairy tales ever told. If I don’t then I am happy that I had the strength to walk away from something that wasn’t for me. No matter what you feel for anyone in this world whether it’s a love interest, a friend, work colleague or family member, you can not allow them to take the best bits of you, and leave the bits they don’t want sometimes you have to look after your own happiness not theirs!!!
Keep everything crossed for me!!