I realise what I’m about to write won’t exactly put in the best of lights in fact it will probably make me sound like an utter cow but I’m all about being honest on my blog, so please be gentle with me. This past week I have spent every evening with at least one of my friends, laughing, crying, eating or just watching films in total silence, just enjoying friendships and enjoying time with people who love me flaws and all. It has taken me such a long time to get here, in my late teens, early twenties I was probably an awful human being! Of course I never meant to be I just was, I didn’t really put much time or effort into any of my relationships, instead I just really wanted to enjoy myself, which I did, a lot. I was quick to argue and even quicker to cut people out of my life. In fact from that time in my life I only have one friend left ( granted she is the best friend ), I was a pretty angry child and even worse as a teenager and I guess I pushed people away to stop people getting close to me and allowing them to use me. Then I got married and meet new friends, I put my selfish lifestyle behind me and finally settled into my adult life, still I was a little cocky when it came to friendships and still not wanting to hurt, I let a few people in, but I did let a few people in. However when my marriage failed I soon realised that these people where more interested in the drama than how I felt, which really hurt but I decided change was good. So I moved towns and changed my phone number and I guess I felt alone but strangely strong and for the first time in my life I decided to stop moving from relationship to relationship and just focus on myself and my needs and by doing that I discovered that I had a lot of good qualities, I realised I deserved my own happiness.
I tried to think of ways I made friends in the past which ranged from the classic primary school line ” do you want to be friends “, straight to the point, but may look a little crazy coming from a thirty something woman. To doing ten shots in a club and spending 30 minutes in the toilets hugging some girl whilst declaring that we will be friends forever. Turns out the classic do you want to be friends line actually works, that’s how me and Sarah become friends, I literally just walked up to her and asked her, luckily she said yes we then celebrated with ten shots in a club followed by hugging in the toilets. Four years on and she’s still my rock and my Saturday night girl, in fact I will be spending Valentine’s day with her. Samantha has been my friend since I was 15 years old and we actually did the ten shots in a club and hugged all night long in the toilets, we have gone from drinking blue wkds to drinking coffee together, we have been through every joy and pain together, we yell and not talk for weeks but we always make our ways back to each other like nothing had ever happened. And along the way I have made more friends, and although I probably only have six friends now, I have the six best friends and although we don’t all socialise together I know that they will always be there for me, they don’t question my actions, they don’t gossip about me. They all support me, they listen to me and encourage me, they truly make me believe that I am capable of anything and because of this they make me a better person.
This week while I have spent time with all of them they made me realise how amazing my life is and how truly blessed I am to be around strong, independent, loving women. Honestly everyday has been like a chick flick, that moment when the main character goes into slow motion whilst taking in what is happening around her before a grin so big the cheshire cat would be jealous crosses her face. I don’t even think this blog post has a point I just wanted to tell you how much I love my friends and how lucky I am. I guess the point is, you are never too old to change your life or that strong women truly build each other up, not to mention a dozen more inspirational quotes.
But since today is Monday, why not ring a friend that you haven’t spoke to for too long and have a good chat and laugh.